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It Must Be Tough Being Sarah Palin December 21, 2011

Posted by Skippy in Observations, Politics.
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One must really feel for poor Sarah Palin. First, her reality show on TLC tanks–I mean, it’s TLC. They show reality shows about poop drying. Then her poor daughter Bristol doesn’t win “Dancing with the Stars,” a loss which is most likely attributable to the fact that everyone in Not Real America has a massive grudge against Poor Sarah Palin. And then, she’s upstaged by a politician who is even dumber than she is! All Sarah wanted to do was represent Real America, and here comes this crazier-eyed Michelle Bachmann! And her husband isn’t even cute! Or straight! Allegedly! I mean, was Michelle Bachmann ever a grizzly mom quitter governor of a frontier state? No! But Michelle Bachmann did actually make a run for the presidency, instead of doing all this wink-and-nod bullshit that Palin’s been doing since 2008. Nevertheless, we shouldn’t let facts get in the way of one incontrovertible point: Sarah Palin has pretty much failed as a media personality. And when that happens, when an ascendant political celebrity sees his/her fortunes waning, they must do one thing:

Swing for the fences and go even crazier. And with the help of—who else?—Fox News, Palin does just that.

This is what she has to say…about President Obama’s Christmas card:

Former Alaska Governor Sarah Palin told Fox News & Commentary that she found the card to be a bit unusual.
“It’s odd,” she said, wondering why the president’s Christmas card highlights his dog instead of traditions like “family, faith and freedom.”
“Even stranger than that was his first year in office when the Christmas ornaments included Chairman Mao,” Palin said. “People had to ask that it be removed because it was offensive.”

Oh, honey. It’s a fucking Christmas card, not the Declaration of Independence. What is the card supposed to have? An armed-to-the-teeth Obama parachuting into Afghanistan wearing a Santa suit and busting caps in Osama Bin Laden’s ass while screaming, “Merry Christmas, Unbeliever”?

See, this is what happens when irrelevant people begin to openly slide into irrelevance. Grasping at any chance to find themselves on the front page, they will say or do anything—ANYTHING—just for a taste of that sweet, sweet fame they once enjoyed, until finally, they say something so outrageous and utterly stupid, that even Charlie Sheen is all, “Dude, WTF?”

Oh, and here’s the allegedly offensive Christmas card:


Fig. 1: What, you don’t see the Muslims in the background dancing on the burned bits of the Constitution and the U.S. Flag while Obama is smiling and smoking a doobie?

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