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It’s Just A Snow Penis, People. December 30, 2010

Posted by Skippy in General Weirdness, Rants.
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Want further proof that “Idiocracy” was a documentary and not a comedy? Here you go:

Apparently, there’s some kind of state law in Indiana that prohibits the construction of snow penises or something like that.

Children, people need to calm the fuck down. Freaking out over a penis made of snow? I mean, have these people never seen a penis? I’m assuming that some of these people who’ve thrown a hissy fit over a snow penis are either in possession of one or have seen one, but given the puritanical outrage associated with a damned snow penis, I’d have to assume that these people have some sort of elaborate apparatus installed so when they take a piss or have sex they don’t have to either see or handle the offending appendage.

I mean, really. I don’t like truck nuts—I think they’re stupid and indicative of the relative intelligence of the person who deigned to have them on their car. But it never occurred to me to start a movement that would lead to outlawing truck nuts. Why? Because at the end of the fucking day…

…I don’t give a shit.

You know why? Because at the end of the fucking day, a truck nut or a snow penis isn’t impinging on my life, liberty or pursuit of happiness. I’m going to be really pissed about morons who think that gays getting married is the End of All Things, or patriarchal fucktards who spew stupidities left, right, and center. Why? Because those fuckers have the potential to cause real damage to American society. A snow penis? It’ll fucking melt. Truck nuts on a giant SUV? I can pass right by it and keep on rolling to my next destination. And I don’t have to put one on my car, either.

So, in short, to all you offended people in Indiana who were just shocked and appalled at the sight of a goddamn snow penis? Get a fucking grip and lose the puritanism, PLEASE.

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