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Nitpicky! September 19, 2010

Posted by Skippy in Observations, Science Ficton.
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Children, I’ve probably seen “Return of the Jedi” literally a thousand times. On VHS, on TV, on DVD, when the Special Editions were released in the theater, on YouTube…I could probably recite the Original Trilogy word for word. But now, after almost twenty years, I have one huge nitpick at 3:35. HUGE.

Fig. 1: Luke, like his father before him, is one giant dumbass.

Ok, so Luke has to face Vader One Last Time. He also has to face the Emperor. Obi-Wan all but tells Luke that he’s going to have to kill Vader, so we know that it’s not the Worst Thing Ever for a Jedi to kill a Sith. Even in the craptacular prequels, Jedi killing Sith wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. So, during the final lightsaber duel between Vader and Luke, Luke kicks Vader down the stairs and they have a moment where they get all talky. The Emperor is behind Luke. Vader is about twenty feet away from Luke, knocked on his ass and taking his old sweet time getting up. Again, the Emperor is behind Luke. Unarmed. Behind Luke.

Why in the hot hell didn’t Luke Use The Force ™ and sling his lightsaber into the freakin’ Emperor’s neck? Hell, it’s not like Vader was pwning Luke the way he did in “The Empire Strikes Back”—he was barely holding his own. So Luke could have killed the Emperor and removed the one thing that was holding Vader in thrall. Maybe then they could have had that father/son chat Luke kept trying to have during the damn duel.

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