Coupon FAIL. September 18, 2010Posted by Skippy in Observations.
Last week, I was at a football game, and someone was going around handing out coupons to Dick’s Sporting Goods store. Generally, I find coupons to be a bit of a waste of time and money. This one was no exception. The stunning offer on this coupon was a whole ten dollars off…”your purchase of $50 or more.” Children, I don’t think I’ve ever spent “$50 or more” at Dick’s—and why would this coupon spur me to actually go to there?
But wait! The stupid only gets more stupid! I turned the stupid coupon card over and began to read the fine print. It starts out typically enough, with your standard boiler plate nonsense, like, “Minimum purchase of $50 before sales tax” and “Total amount of coupon must be redeemed at one time” and so forth. But then it gets crazy:
Excludes firearms, ammunition, Under Armour, The North Face, Nike Pro, LIVESTRONG, Hyperize, AF1 and Jordan, Brooks, Reebok EasyTone, Ugg, Merrell, Burton, Quicksilver, Roxy, Billabong, Volcom, O’Neill, Fox, EA Sports Active, Ping, Titleist golf balls, select new release Callaway Golf, Odyssey, Cobra and TaylorMade merchandise and championship merchandise. Some additional exclusions may apply.
Ok, seriously? So Dick’s thinks that the average customer is so stupid that they’ll a) get all happy about taking a whole ten dollars off of a purchase and b) won’t bother to read the back of the card and realize that they can’t even use this card on the brands they’re most likely to buy in the first fucking place? Okay, maybe somebody will have a need to go to Dick’s and buy fifty bucks’ worth of crap that is made by Acme and not any of the above named companies—but it’s also likely that that person will get caught by the “additional exclusions” clause.
Also, I know that the above named companies are probably very opposed to discounting and such, so Dick’s probably had to included the disclaimer that this stunning offer didn’t apply to them, but given that these name brands probably account for a huge percentage of their sales, this coupon doesn’t seem like anything more than a pathetic marketing ploy.
Way to be a dick, Dick’s.