Wonder Woman: A Rant

Apparently, this is the week for me to get my geek obsessions on and blog about them. Or maybe this is the week in which I rant about how J. Michael Straczynski is singlehandedly ruining two of my favorite comic book characters. I ranted about his “Grounded” storyline in Superman. Well, kiddos, get ready, because another comic book related rant is a-coming.

You know, I loved JMS’s work on Babylon 5. I still weep at the end of the series finale, even though he so completely aped “The Grey Havens,” he should have given J.R.R. Tolkien a writing credit. I thought that Babylon 5 was one of the best sci-fi shows to grace the small screen. I even loved most of what he did when he wrote The Amazing Spider-Man (before that One More Day nonsense). DC Comics decided it would be a good thing to bring him on to not one, but two comics—the aforeranted Superman and Wonder Woman. Well, what’s his take on the Amazonian Princess going to be?

Nothing short of shittacular, if you ask me. You see, his bright idea is to wipe out about twenty years of stories (and the previous writer Gail Simone’s work) in order to present this “new”, “edgy” Wonder Woman. Of course, no “new” and “edgy” character is complete without a costume redesign.

Fig. 1: This is Wonder Woman as you’ve known her.

Fig. 2: This is the “new” Wonder Woman.

I hate it. Not because I hate change, but because I think the new design is over-designed. To borrow from Nina Garcia, Fashion Director of Marie Claire Magazine, the artist Jim Lee didn’t know when to edit. And what is going on with the jacket? Why does every comic book artist think, “Hey, this character needs to look edgy! I know! I’ll put ’em in a leather jacket!” Oh, and let’s put Diana of Themiscyra in stirrups. Nothing says “functional” like metal stirrups. And since I’m talking about metal, let’s talk about those bracelets. Again, they’re over-designed.

JMS says that a shake-up is “long overdue.” Okay, so how’s this going to fit into the rest of DC continuity? Now that he’s turned her into some kind of vigilante with a Superman-ish background (Paradise Island is destroyed and Diana is sent away to avoid the Island’s destruction—sound familiar?), what’s her relationship to the rest of the DC pantheon? I guess it doesn’t really matter, since he’s got Superman aimlessly walking around the freakin’ country.

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