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Gays in the Military WILL RAPE YOU May 27, 2010

Posted by Skippy in Gay and Lesbian Issues, Observations, Rants.
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So says the Family Research Council.

Fig. 1: I bet this guy’s been on rentboy.com a time or dozen.

The above douchebag is FRC Senior Fellow for Policy Studies Peter Sprigg. He claims that repealing the reprehensible “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” policy would lead to a sexual free-for-all with homosexuals assaulting poor, unsuspecting red-blooded heterosexual men in their sleep.

Fig. 2: Did this fool think this was a documentary?

Apparently, this was something I missed during Homorientation. I mean, I was told to disrupt as many marriages as possible, subvert popular culture, corrupt religious institutions and basically undermine the Christian “morality” of the nation all while looking absolutely fabulous, but I didn’t see anything in my Gucci leather packet about raping guys in the military.

But if you think I’m making this shit up (and when it comes to the Family Research Council, one could be forgiven for thinking that), let me snatch a quote from TPM:

We are today releasing an analysis of publicly available documents which show that homosexuals in the military are three times more likely to commit sexual assaults than heterosexuals are relative to their numbers,” Sprigg said. “We believe this problem would only increase if the current law against homosexuality…were to be repealed

Well, you’ve certainly convinced me! Oh, wait. I have a question. How did you arrive at that conclusion, Mr. Sprigg, Defender of Heterosexuality?

Sprigg said his “analysis” was military documents tracking sexual assault cases. According to his figures, 8.2% of sexual assaults reported to military authorities in fiscal 2009 were homosexual in nature.

“Yet homosexual activists themselves have admitted that less than 3% of Americans — 2.8% of men and 1.4% of women — are homosexual or bi-sexual,” Sprigg explained.

“Taken together,” he continued, “these figures suggest that homosexuals in the military are about 3x as likely to commit sexual assaults as heterosexuals are.”

And the “most common type of homosexual assault” according to Sprigg? “one in which the offender fondles or performs oral sex on a sleeping victim,” he said.

Wait, what? What? WHAT? I don’t do statistics, but something about that just reeks of stupid. No, not just stupid, UNBELIEVABLY stupid.
* Idiot assumption #1: Those same-sex assaults were directly correlated with the sexual identities of the perpetrators.
* Idiot assumption #2: The number of homosexuals in America is directly proportional to some imagined “propensity” towards sexual assault.
* Idiot assumption #3: That people would be stupid enough to find his idiot “findings” to be anything other than what they are: the ravings of a bigoted jackass who refuses to join the rest of us in the 21st century.

Between this and some idiot on Facebook with whom I had the distinct misfortune of encountering, I really have to wonder if these anti-gay folk are in some way brain-damaged. The leaps they make with logic and data are amazing. They uniformly love to make arguments that fall into two camps:
1. The argumentum ad populum. The idiot on Facebook quite literally said that the majority of Americans aren’t homosexual. Um, okay. The majority of Americans aren’t left-handed or Trekkies, either. Simply stating that there are more of X than there are of Y is a non-argument. Frankly, such foolishness need only be met with the haughtiest of derision.

Fig. 3: This is the look your argument warrants.

2. Fallacies of correlation/causation. These idiots LOVE to trot out what they think are “statistics.” They love to pull out random numbers and then imply that the correlation equals causation. As in the case above, that “8.2%” of sexual assaults in the military were “homosexual in nature”(um, fool, all that means is that the incident involved two people of the same gender) means that we can expect the number to go up. How, you ask? By taking the percentage of homosexuals in the nation and doing simple multiplication! See, distorting numbers in order to justify your bigotry is EASY!


Fig. 4: Bigotry: so easy, a caveman could do it!

Of course, this “evidence” will play well to those who already think that being gay or lesbian is “wrong” and can be “fixed” and will heartily vote to deny us our civil rights. This “evidence” of course characterizes gay men as inveterate predators who, if allowed to run about unchecked by the saintly heterosexuals who have all their sexual shit together, will rape every man they come across. Oh yeah, and if we’re allowed to serve openly in the military…well, then all those aforementioned red-blooded heterosexual men will stop joining the military. There will be nothing but swishy guys and butch gals in uniform. It’ll be the end of the nation as we know it!

Fig. 5: There were no gay men in the military. Ever. Nope, not a one.

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